Agony of soul

“Now is my soul troubled ...” (John 12:27)

The Son of God had talked with His disciples about the path of discipleship. He spoke to them about the cost, but also about the reward that awaited them. Then suddenly the cross stood before His holy soul. The thought that in a few days, because of the guilt of others, He would be forsaken by God and would have to die, deeply distressed Him. But this was the price He had to pay, so that people could be saved from hell to live together with Him in the Father's house for all eternity.

The Lord Jesus spoke openly in prayer with His Father about how He felt. He did not use any empty platitudes or learned expressions, but said things as they were and how He felt them. Do you do this when you pray? In the Psalms we can often read where the Spirit of God inspired believers to record their feelings in prayers. Our feelings are not irrelevant to God. On the contrary! He is compassionate, gives true comfort, and gives the encouragement we need at the right time.

The Son of God experienced fear and dismay in a much deeper way than we will ever feel. "In all their affliction he was afflicted" (Isa 63:9) Isaiah writes in reference to the Jewish remnant who will one day go through the awful time of the Tribulation. Even the martyrs in Smyrna who were facing death, could be understood by the Lord Jesus from His own experience (Rev 2:8-9). He also knows exactly how you feel at this moment!

Jesus was deeply moved in spirit when He saw people crying at the tomb of Lazarus (see John 11:33). He was troubled in spirit when Judas was about to betray Him and shortly afterwards to take his own life (see John 13:21). Now His soul was dismayed because death, the King of terrors, stood before Him (see Job 18:14). Against this background it is touching to read what the Son of God said to His disciples a short time later, "Let not your heart be troubled" (John 14:1). Because He was dismayed and shaken, they no longer needed to be!

We have the firm promise that God will also provide the way of escape out of every temptation, so that we can bear it (see 1 Cor 10:13). Therefore, like the Psalmist, we can say, "Why are you cast down, my soul, and are disquieted in me? Hope in God; for I will yet praise him, for the salvations (see footnote) of his countenance" (Ps 42:5).

Do you tell your Lord openly in prayer about your fears and how you feel? Are you aware that He can, from His own experience, understand you perfectly? He cares about you (1 Pet 5:7) and He cares about your feelings!

J.P.S.